No matter how hard one tries, it is impossible to completely separate one's personal and professional lives. Worries, annoyances, illness--it all bleeds through. If an educational professional is experiencing one or more -isms in their personal life, this is bound to effect interactions with coworkers, families, and students.
One stereotype that most professionals in the field of early childhood education is that we are nothing more than glorified babysitters and that we aren't "real" teachers. I am faced with this attitude by at least one parent almost every single year. When faced with this attitude now, I simply pull out my professional development record log (held in an overstuffed 3" ringed binder) and explain the extensive amount of education I have achieved, including the progress towards my advanced degree. A few years ago, however, it was no so easy to brush such prejudice aside, especially since the center for which I was working didn't value their teachers any more than the parents did. It seemed as though nearly all of the parents viewed the teaching staff as servants and treated us as such. This attitude was picked up by the children, who showed no respect for anyone or anything. I found myself resenting the parents who treated my so unfairly, and resenting their children as well. It got so bad that I dreaded going to work each day, and it took a serious toll on my health. In fact, I seriously considered leaving the field altogether.
My husband saw what this was doing to me and he insisted that I leave that job and take a much-needed break instead. It took several months for me to work up the courage to try teaching again. That was five years ago. Although I still struggle with my blood pressure, I have eliminated the other health issues caused by the extreme stress I was under. I am in a center that is challenging but supportive and respectful. While I still encounter the occasional prejudiced parent, they are not the majority,and I have the full support of my co-workers and director. Because I no longer have to deal with that "-ism", I can focus my talents and attentions on my students.
Saturday, November 28, 2015
Saturday, November 14, 2015
EDUC 6358 WK 3 observing communication
As a teacher of young children, I find that I instinctively observe children throughout the day--regardless of where I am of if I even know the child. Sometimes what I see and hear is entertaining. Sometimes it is bewildering. Sometimes what I observe makes me scared and angry, and on more than one occasion, afraid for the safety of the child.
For this week's assignment, I was to observe communications between adults and children and reflect upon what I observed. I decided to use morning drop-off at the center where I work as an opportunity to see many such observations.
In several instances, the children were in a rush to talk to their friends--the parents barely had a chance to say goodbye and most got a quick wave or "Bye" in return before the children were off to begin their day. These children, for the most part, were children who had been coming to the center for quite some time. They were used to the routine, familiar with the staff and the other children, and for the most part school-aged, meaning already enrolled in kindergarten or above.
One conversation which caught my attention was between a preschooler and his mother. The boy was having a hard time separating from his mother--he was crying, begging for another kiss, and complaining of a stomach ache. His mother responded that he probably had a stomach ache because his "no-good father probably let him eat too much junk, as usual." The mother then turned to a teacher and said "He has a stomach ache thanks to his idiot father. If you are going to make me come back for him, I am just going to take him home now." The child began crying louder. The teacher squatted down so as to be on eye level with the child. She felt his forehead and asked where he hurt. He shrugged and looked down at the floor. The teacher suggested that he go to the bathroom and wash his face and that maybe he would feel better, and asked another teacher to take him. While the child was in the restroom, the teacher walked the mother to the door and assured her that her son would be fine, and that we would call her to come back only if the child were seriously ill. By the time the child returned to the room he had calmed down and was able to join his friends who were playing in the block area.
At breakfast, I made a point of sitting near this child. I asked the group at the table how their mornings were, and asked them to tell me about what they had done before they came to school. One child said he watched TV, another said she took a shower. The little boy who had been so upset said that he made his mother mad at his daddy. I asked the child to tell me what has happened. He said that he left his jacket at his daddy's house, and his mommy was mad at his daddy for not bringing it. He said she yelled at daddy on the phone on the ride to school and said she wasn't going to let him stay at daddy's house anymore. The child then said that he didn't mean to forget his coat and make his mommy mad but he forgot. He said he was scared that they were going to have to move again because he was bad. I assured the child that sometimes mommies and daddies get angry and say things they don't mean, but that none of it was his fault. I spoke to this child's teacher as well as the director about the conversation I had with the child, as well as what I had witnessed earlier in the day. I found out that the mother had just broken it off with her boyfriend and moved out, taking the children with her. She was currently living with a family member, but that it wasn't going well. The mother did not have a job and the father was looking into filing for sole custody.
Adults often speak in the presence of children and forget that what they say and how they say it is being observed. In this instance, the parents are not getting along, and the child is being dragged into the middle of the conflict. He is fearful of upsetting his mother because he knows she will blame his father and that she will take him away from his father. The child is taking responsibility for his parents' anger and his emotions are taking their toll on him.The child has given off many cues as to how this is upsetting him--separation anxiety, tears, and stomach aches--but the signs are being ignored my his mother. When talking to children, it is important to remember that we need to pay attention to non-verbal as well as what is being said. Many times, children do not have the vocabulary to accurately express their emotions. The director said she would set up a meeting with both parents as quickly as possible to see what could be done to improve this situation. Both parents need to understand that, while they may be fighting with each other, that their child is not part of the disagreement and needs to be left out of it. The child needs reassurances that they both still love him and that it is ok for him to love both of them, even if they don't love each other anymore.
For this week's assignment, I was to observe communications between adults and children and reflect upon what I observed. I decided to use morning drop-off at the center where I work as an opportunity to see many such observations.
In several instances, the children were in a rush to talk to their friends--the parents barely had a chance to say goodbye and most got a quick wave or "Bye" in return before the children were off to begin their day. These children, for the most part, were children who had been coming to the center for quite some time. They were used to the routine, familiar with the staff and the other children, and for the most part school-aged, meaning already enrolled in kindergarten or above.
One conversation which caught my attention was between a preschooler and his mother. The boy was having a hard time separating from his mother--he was crying, begging for another kiss, and complaining of a stomach ache. His mother responded that he probably had a stomach ache because his "no-good father probably let him eat too much junk, as usual." The mother then turned to a teacher and said "He has a stomach ache thanks to his idiot father. If you are going to make me come back for him, I am just going to take him home now." The child began crying louder. The teacher squatted down so as to be on eye level with the child. She felt his forehead and asked where he hurt. He shrugged and looked down at the floor. The teacher suggested that he go to the bathroom and wash his face and that maybe he would feel better, and asked another teacher to take him. While the child was in the restroom, the teacher walked the mother to the door and assured her that her son would be fine, and that we would call her to come back only if the child were seriously ill. By the time the child returned to the room he had calmed down and was able to join his friends who were playing in the block area.
At breakfast, I made a point of sitting near this child. I asked the group at the table how their mornings were, and asked them to tell me about what they had done before they came to school. One child said he watched TV, another said she took a shower. The little boy who had been so upset said that he made his mother mad at his daddy. I asked the child to tell me what has happened. He said that he left his jacket at his daddy's house, and his mommy was mad at his daddy for not bringing it. He said she yelled at daddy on the phone on the ride to school and said she wasn't going to let him stay at daddy's house anymore. The child then said that he didn't mean to forget his coat and make his mommy mad but he forgot. He said he was scared that they were going to have to move again because he was bad. I assured the child that sometimes mommies and daddies get angry and say things they don't mean, but that none of it was his fault. I spoke to this child's teacher as well as the director about the conversation I had with the child, as well as what I had witnessed earlier in the day. I found out that the mother had just broken it off with her boyfriend and moved out, taking the children with her. She was currently living with a family member, but that it wasn't going well. The mother did not have a job and the father was looking into filing for sole custody.
Adults often speak in the presence of children and forget that what they say and how they say it is being observed. In this instance, the parents are not getting along, and the child is being dragged into the middle of the conflict. He is fearful of upsetting his mother because he knows she will blame his father and that she will take him away from his father. The child is taking responsibility for his parents' anger and his emotions are taking their toll on him.The child has given off many cues as to how this is upsetting him--separation anxiety, tears, and stomach aches--but the signs are being ignored my his mother. When talking to children, it is important to remember that we need to pay attention to non-verbal as well as what is being said. Many times, children do not have the vocabulary to accurately express their emotions. The director said she would set up a meeting with both parents as quickly as possible to see what could be done to improve this situation. Both parents need to understand that, while they may be fighting with each other, that their child is not part of the disagreement and needs to be left out of it. The child needs reassurances that they both still love him and that it is ok for him to love both of them, even if they don't love each other anymore.
Saturday, November 7, 2015
EDUC 6358 WK 2 Blog--Creating Affirming Environments
This week I am to envision how I would personally set up my environment if I were to open a Family Child Care Home. Frankly, I imagine it would look very similar to the classroom I now teach in, since I have been given a pretty free rein as to how I would like the space set up.
To start with, I would have an area near the entrance for parents to sign in and out with individual cubbies for the children to store their belongings. I would encourage the families to hang family photographs in and around the cubbies or bring in items they wish to display (a family wall) so that the children can "see" their family at any time during the day, and also to allow visuals from which discussions about their families can be started. In this area I would post menus, calendars, announcements, and important information all translated into each family's home language, as well as a log in which parents and teachers could write notes to each other when they are unable to take the time to have a conversation . This space would also include comfortable seating to allow parents to sit with their child before leaving, making transition time easier on both child and parent.
I would have areas dedicated to different skill sets (art, blocks, large motor, etc.) well stocked with a variety of toys and learning materials representing many different cultures, abilities, jobs, family types and backgrounds. Dolls, puzzles, storybooks, props and dress up clothes representing many different skin colors, jobs, cultural backgrounds, and physical abilities would be available. Markers, crayons, paper, and paints representing a variety of skin tones would be available. Materials would be adapted to meet individual needs. Walkways and entrances would be wide enough to allow access for all. Furniture would be sized appropriately for the children. Materials would be stored on low, open shelves--labelled using photographs and words in each home language. Photographs of the children learning and playing would be displayed in each area, and posters and pictures of a diverse representation of people in non-stereotypical roles would be hung on the children's level. Children need to be able to personally identify with the toys they are using. If they cannot draw a picture of themselves because there are no art supplies which represent them, or cannot go into a play area because their wheelchair will not fit through the entrance, or cannot operate a toy due to a physical challenge, they can become discouraged and develop negative self-images--something that is not acceptable in an anti-biased based learning center. The outdoor play area, much like the indoor play area, would offer a variety of challenges for the children to play and learn. Materials would be adapted to meet individual needs.
While the children would have a great deal of time in which to choose their activities, teachers would carefully plan what materials to offer based on the interests of the children, as well as the current theme being taught. Teachers would carefully observe the students at play, addressing any issues such as discrimination or lack of accessibility as needed. Teachers would also plan activities which challenge the children to learn and develop, but are not overly challenging. Students will not learn if they are prevented from succeeding.
My home center would also have an area in which all the children and staff could share their meals together. The furniture would be sized appropriately and accommodate different needs. The meals would be well-balanced and offer the opportunity for children to eat foods which are familiar to them as well as chances to try new foods from a variety of cultures. Special attention would be given to students with food allergies so as not to endanger a child's health. Dietary restrictions--regardless of whether they are medical, religious, or cultural in nature--would be honored.
An area dedicated to quiet play and resting would also be essential. Each child would have their own cot or crib available when they are tired and need to rest. Students would be encouraged to bring items from home that help them feel safe and comfortable when settling down, such as a favorite stuffed animal or blanket. Books, puzzles, and other quiet-time activities would be available for children who are not sleepy but need some down time. Again, these materials would represent different cultures, ages, abilities, and languages. Stereotypical materials would be avoided. Bathrooms would also feature appropriately-sized fixtures and be accessible to all.
Providing such a vast variety of materials can be costly. Flea markets and yard sales can allow teachers to stock their classrooms much more affordably, provided that the materials they find are safe and in good working order. Materials such as books, posters, games, and puzzles can be hand-made. Families are an excellent resource: many would be willing to make books, provide pictures, and make posters representing their own culture, job, family, and language. Having materials made by the students and their families is just one more way to insure that the children will feel comfortable, accepted, and valued.
To start with, I would have an area near the entrance for parents to sign in and out with individual cubbies for the children to store their belongings. I would encourage the families to hang family photographs in and around the cubbies or bring in items they wish to display (a family wall) so that the children can "see" their family at any time during the day, and also to allow visuals from which discussions about their families can be started. In this area I would post menus, calendars, announcements, and important information all translated into each family's home language, as well as a log in which parents and teachers could write notes to each other when they are unable to take the time to have a conversation . This space would also include comfortable seating to allow parents to sit with their child before leaving, making transition time easier on both child and parent.
I would have areas dedicated to different skill sets (art, blocks, large motor, etc.) well stocked with a variety of toys and learning materials representing many different cultures, abilities, jobs, family types and backgrounds. Dolls, puzzles, storybooks, props and dress up clothes representing many different skin colors, jobs, cultural backgrounds, and physical abilities would be available. Markers, crayons, paper, and paints representing a variety of skin tones would be available. Materials would be adapted to meet individual needs. Walkways and entrances would be wide enough to allow access for all. Furniture would be sized appropriately for the children. Materials would be stored on low, open shelves--labelled using photographs and words in each home language. Photographs of the children learning and playing would be displayed in each area, and posters and pictures of a diverse representation of people in non-stereotypical roles would be hung on the children's level. Children need to be able to personally identify with the toys they are using. If they cannot draw a picture of themselves because there are no art supplies which represent them, or cannot go into a play area because their wheelchair will not fit through the entrance, or cannot operate a toy due to a physical challenge, they can become discouraged and develop negative self-images--something that is not acceptable in an anti-biased based learning center. The outdoor play area, much like the indoor play area, would offer a variety of challenges for the children to play and learn. Materials would be adapted to meet individual needs.
While the children would have a great deal of time in which to choose their activities, teachers would carefully plan what materials to offer based on the interests of the children, as well as the current theme being taught. Teachers would carefully observe the students at play, addressing any issues such as discrimination or lack of accessibility as needed. Teachers would also plan activities which challenge the children to learn and develop, but are not overly challenging. Students will not learn if they are prevented from succeeding.
My home center would also have an area in which all the children and staff could share their meals together. The furniture would be sized appropriately and accommodate different needs. The meals would be well-balanced and offer the opportunity for children to eat foods which are familiar to them as well as chances to try new foods from a variety of cultures. Special attention would be given to students with food allergies so as not to endanger a child's health. Dietary restrictions--regardless of whether they are medical, religious, or cultural in nature--would be honored.
An area dedicated to quiet play and resting would also be essential. Each child would have their own cot or crib available when they are tired and need to rest. Students would be encouraged to bring items from home that help them feel safe and comfortable when settling down, such as a favorite stuffed animal or blanket. Books, puzzles, and other quiet-time activities would be available for children who are not sleepy but need some down time. Again, these materials would represent different cultures, ages, abilities, and languages. Stereotypical materials would be avoided. Bathrooms would also feature appropriately-sized fixtures and be accessible to all.
Providing such a vast variety of materials can be costly. Flea markets and yard sales can allow teachers to stock their classrooms much more affordably, provided that the materials they find are safe and in good working order. Materials such as books, posters, games, and puzzles can be hand-made. Families are an excellent resource: many would be willing to make books, provide pictures, and make posters representing their own culture, job, family, and language. Having materials made by the students and their families is just one more way to insure that the children will feel comfortable, accepted, and valued.
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